Tokoni ki ha Tokotaha LGBTQ+ mo e Mahaki Fakangaloku

Ko e ʻulungaanga ʻo ha tokotaha LGBTQ+ ko e konga pē ia ʻe taha ʻo hono tuʻungá. ʻEke pe ko e hā ʻoku mahuʻinga kiate iá, ngāueʻaki ʻa e ngaahi lea ʻokú ne filí, pea tuku ke ne fili pe ko hai ʻe lava ke ne ʻiloʻi ʻa e ngaahi meʻa fakafoʻituituí. ʻOua ʻe pehē pē ʻokú ke ʻiloʻi ʻa e ʻulungaanga, hoa, poupou fakafāmili, pe ngaahi fakaʻamu fakapulipuli ʻa ha tokotaha mei hono fōtungá, lekooti motuʻá, pe ko hai ʻoku ʻaʻahí.

ʻOku fokotuʻu mai ʻe he Alzheimer’s Society’s guide to supporting an LGBTQ+ person with dementia ke ʻeke fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi fakaʻamu ʻa e tokotahá pea fakaʻehiʻehi mei he pehē pē ʻokú ke ʻiloʻi ʻa e ngaahi vā fetuʻutakí. ʻOku toe fakamatalaʻi ʻe he Alzheimer’s Association’s LGBTQ+ dementia resources ʻa e ngaahi hohaʻa fekauʻaki mo e fakamaau taʻetotonu mo e kumi ha tauhi ʻoku talitali lelei. ʻOku kehekehe ʻa e kakai takitaha; ngāueʻaki ʻa e ngaahi fakakaukau ko ení ko ha ngaahi kamataʻanga ki ha talanoa, ʻo ʻikai ko ha lisi ʻoku ne fakamatalaʻi ha taha.

ʻE lava fēfē ke u ʻeke fekauʻaki mo e hingoa, fetongi hingoa mo e meʻa fakapulipuli?

Fili ha taimi ʻoku fakapulipuli mo ʻikai fakavavevave. Te ke lava ʻo ʻeke, «Ko e hā ʻa e hingoa mo e fetongi hingoa ʻokú ke loto ke mau ngāueʻakí?» pe «ʻOku ʻi ai ha meʻa fekauʻaki mo ho ʻulungaangá pe ngaahi vā fetuʻutakí ʻokú ke loto ke ʻilo ʻe he kakai ʻoku nau tokoniʻi koé?» ʻE lava ke tali fakakonga pē ʻa e tokotahá, pehē ʻikai, pe toe foki ki ai ʻamui. ʻOku ʻikai fiemaʻu ke ke ʻeke ha ngaahi fehuʻi fakafoʻituitui ʻoku ʻikai fekauʻaki mo ʻene tauhí.

ʻEke pe ko hai ʻe lava ke ne ʻiloʻi ʻa e hā. ʻE loto nai ha taha ke ʻiloʻi ʻe he kau ngāué hono hoá ka ʻoku ʻikai ke ne loto ke tala ki hono fāmili lahí ʻa hono tuʻunga fakasekisualé pe ʻulungaanga fakasēnitá. ʻE toe saiʻia nai ha tokotaha ʻi ha ngaahi lea kehekehe ʻi he ngaahi feituʻu kehekehe. ʻOua ʻe vahevahe ʻa e ngaahi fakamatala fekauʻaki mo e ʻulungaangá ki he kāingá, kau ʻaʻahí, pe kau ngāué koeʻuhí pē ʻokú ke ʻiloʻi ia.

Kapau ʻoku loto ʻa e tokotahá ke lekooti ha fili, ʻeke pe ko e hā ke tohí pea ko hai ʻoku totonu ke ne sio ki aí. Vakaiʻi pe ʻoku tokangaʻi fēfē ʻe he kautaha tokoní ha hingoa ʻoku kehe mei he lekooti kehé, kau ai pe ʻe lava ke ngāueʻaki ʻe he kau ngāué ʻa e hingoa ʻoku saiʻia ai ʻa e tokotahá ʻi he talanoá. Tauhi maʻu ʻa e fakapulipuli ʻa e tokotahá; ʻoku ʻikai fiemaʻu ʻe he tokotaha kotoa pē ʻoku tokoni ʻi he tauhí ke ne ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa kotoa pē.

ʻE lava ke liliu ʻa e ngaahi filí. Toe vakaiʻi ʻi he taimi ʻoku lava ai ʻe he tokotahá ke fakahā ha fili, tautautefito ki muʻa ʻi ha hiki pe ha fokotuʻutuʻu tauhi foʻou. Kapau ʻoku ʻikai mahino pe ko e hā ʻokú ne loto ke vahevá, ʻoua ʻe pehē pē. Muimui ki ha fili mahino naʻá ne ʻosi ʻoatu ki muʻa, pea kole tokoni mei ha tokotaha tauhi taau ʻi ho feituʻú ki he ngaahi fehuʻi fekauʻaki mo e mafai ke fai ha fili tauhi pe ngaahi lao ki hono vahevahe ʻo e fakamatalá.

Ko hai ʻoku totonu ke kau ʻi he ngaahi talanoa fekauʻaki mo e tauhí?

ʻEke ki he tokotahá pe ko hai ʻokú ne falala ki ai pea loto ke kau aí. ʻE kau nai ʻi heʻene kau poupoú ha mali, hoa, kaumeʻa ofi, kāinga, pe «fāmili fili» — ko e kakai ʻoku nau poupouʻi ia hangē ha fāmilí neongo ʻoku ʻikai ko hono kāinga. ʻOku falala ʻa e niʻihi ki honau fāmili tupuʻangá; ko e niʻihi ʻoku ʻikai. Tuku ke fakamatalaʻi ʻe he tokotahá ʻene ngaahi vā fetuʻutakí ʻaki ʻene lea pē ʻaʻana.

ʻEke ha ngaahi fehuʻi ʻaonga: Ko hai ʻe lava ke ʻaʻahi? Ko hai ʻoku totonu ke telefoni ki ai ʻe he kau ngāué kapau ʻe liliu ʻa e ngaahi palaní? Ko hai ʻe lava ke maʻu ha fakamatala foʻou? Kapau ʻoku fiemaʻu ʻe ha kautaha tokoni ha ngofua pe pepa ki muʻa ʻi hono vahevahe ʻo ha fakamatalá, ʻeke pe ko e hā ʻoku fiemaʻú pea fakamatalaʻi ʻa e ngaahi filí ki he tokotahá. Ko e hoko ko ha hoa pe poupou fili ʻoku ʻikai ʻuhinga ia pē ʻoku maʻu ai ʻa e mafai fakalao ke fai ha ngaahi filí; ʻoku kehekehe ʻa e ngaahi lao ʻo fakatatau ki he feituʻú.

Ngāueʻaki ʻa e hingoa vā fetuʻutaki ʻoku saiʻia ai ʻa e tokotahá. Kapau ʻoku ui ʻe ha tokotaha tauhi ha hoa ko ha «kaumeʻa» pe «kāinga» ʻi he taimi ʻoku loto ai ʻa e tokotahá ke ʻiloʻi ia ko hono hoá, ʻe lava ke ne ongoʻi loto mamahi ai. ʻE lava ke tokoni ha kiʻi fakamatala nounou, makatuʻunga ʻi he ngofuá, ke tala ki he kau ngāué pe ʻoku totonu ke fakafeʻiloaki fēfē ʻa e kakaí pea ko e hā ʻa e ngaahi fakamatala ʻe lava ke vahevá.

Ko e hā ʻe lava ke u ʻeke ki ha kautaha tokoni?

ʻI hono fakafehoanaki ʻo e tauhi nofoʻanga, tokoni ʻi ʻapi, pe ngāue ʻaho ki he kakai lalahí, ʻeke ki he tokotahá pe ko e hā ʻa e ngaahi fehuʻi ʻokú ne loto ke ʻohaké pea pe ʻokú ne loto ke ke ʻi ai. ʻOku fakamatalaʻi ʻe he SAGE guide to affirming services ʻe lava ke ongoʻi vaivai ʻa e vahevahe ʻo ha fakamatala fakafoʻituitui ki ha kautaha tokoni. Kole ki he kautaha tokoní ke ne fakamatalaʻi ʻene ngaahi founga ngāue lolotongá ʻi ha lea maʻalaʻala.

• ʻOku mou lekooti fēfē ha hingoa mo ha fetongi hingoa ʻoku saiʻia ai ha taha? Ko fē ʻa e kau ngāue ʻe lava ke nau sio ki he fakamatalá ni?
• ʻE lava fēfē ke fili ʻe ha tokotaha pe ko hai ʻe ʻaʻahi pea maʻu ha taimi fakapulipuli mo ha hoa pe poupou kehe?
• ʻOku mou ako mo fakaʻapaʻapaʻi fēfē ʻa e ngaahi fili ʻa e tokotahá fekauʻaki mo e loki, vala, mo e tokanga fakafoʻituituí?
• Ko e hā ʻa e akoako ʻoku maʻu ʻe he kau ngāué fekauʻaki mo e kakai lālahi LGBTQ+ mo e mahaki fakangalokú?
• ʻE lava fēfē ke ʻohake ʻe ha tokotaha nofo pe poupou ha hohaʻa fekauʻaki mo e fakapulipulí pe taʻefakaʻapaʻapá, pea ko e hā ʻoku hoko atu aí?

ʻOku fokotuʻu mai ʻe he SAGE and Human Rights Campaign Foundation guide to inclusive long-term care ke vakaiʻi ʻa e ngaahi tuʻutuʻuni kuo tohi fekauʻaki mo e ʻaʻahí, nofoʻanga fakalokí, mo e founga ngāue ʻa e kau ngāué. Naʻe pulusi ia ʻi he 2021; ngāueʻaki ia ki he ngaahi fehuʻi ke ʻeké, ʻo ʻikai ko ha fakamatala ki he lao fakalotofonua lolotongá. ʻOku kehekehe ʻa e ngaahi tuʻutuʻuní mo e ngaahi ngāué ʻo fakatatau ki he feituʻú.

ʻOku ʻikai lava ke fakapapauʻi ʻe ha fakaʻilonga, tohi fakamatala, pe tali fakafiemālie ʻe taha pe ʻe fēfē ʻa e ongo ʻo e tauhi fakaʻahó. Kapau ʻoku loto ʻa e tokotahá ke ʻaʻahi, fakatokangaʻi pe ʻoku fakafeʻiloaki fēfē ia ʻe he kau ngāué pea tali fēfē hono hoá pe kau poupou filí. Kole ke talanoa fakapulipuli mo ha tokotaha ngāue kapau ʻe tokoni ia ke ongoʻi malu ʻa e tokotahá.

ʻE lava fēfē ke u tokoni ki he tokotaha kotoá?

ʻEke fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi meʻa ʻoku manako ai ʻa e tokotahá ʻi he ʻaho kotoa, ngaahi tōʻonga, lea, anga fakafonua, tui fakalotu, kaungāmeʻa, mo e komiunitií. ʻE mahuʻinga nai ke talanoa ki hono ʻulungaangá, pe te ne saiʻia nai ke fakamoleki ʻa e taimí ʻi he ngaahi konga kehe ʻo e moʻuí. ʻOua ʻe ʻai ʻa e ʻaʻahi kotoa pē ko ha talanoa fekauʻaki mo e ʻulungaangá pe pehē pē ʻoku tatau ʻa e ngaahi aʻusia ʻa e kakai LGBTQ+ kotoa pē.

Kuo fehangahangai nai ʻa e niʻihi mo e talitekeʻi pe fakafeangai taʻetotonu pea te nau ongoʻi tokanga lahi ange ki he ngaahi ngāué. Ko e niʻihi kehe ʻoku ʻikai ke nau vakai ki ai ko ha hohaʻa. Fanongo lelei ʻo ʻikai kole ki he tokotahá ke ne fakamatalaʻi pe fakamoʻoniʻi ha meʻa. Kapau ʻoku fakatupu loto mamahi ha manatu, laʻitā, pe talanoa fekauʻaki mo e kuohilí, ʻeke pe ʻokú ne loto ke taʻofi pe liliu ʻa e talanoá.

Kapau ko ha hoa, kaumeʻa, pe kāinga koe, ʻoku mahuʻinga foki hoʻo maʻu ʻa e poupoú. ʻEke ki he tokotahá pe ʻokú ne loto ke ke kau fēfē, pea kumi ha kautaha fakalotofonua ki he mahaki fakangalokú pe ki he kakai lālahi LGBTQ+ kapau ʻokú ke fiemaʻu ha faleʻi. ʻOku fakafehokotaki ʻe he Alzheimer’s Association resource page ki he ngaahi maʻuʻanga tokoni fakakomiuniti mo e kau tokangaʻí; ko e meʻa ʻoku ala maʻu ʻoku fakatefito ia ʻi he feituʻu ʻokú ke nofo aí.

Ki ha lisi lahi ange ʻi hono fakafehoanaki ʻo e ngaahi ʻapi tauhí, vakai ki he choosing residential dementia care. Ki ha tokoni ʻi he palani hili ha ʻiloʻanga mahaki fakangalokú, vakai ki he first steps after a dementia diagnosis.