Impendulo emfushane
Buza ukuthi umuntu ufuna ukubizwa njani, ngubani afuna ambandakanye lokuthi yini afuna yabelwane labanye. Hlonipha abalingani lemuli ekhethiweyo, vikela ubumfihlo, njalo buza abahlinzeki bokunakekelwa ukuthi imithetho yabo isebenza njani empilweni yansuku zonke.
- Buza mayelana lebizo lomuntu, izabizwana, ubudlelwano kanye lalokho akuthandayo ngobumfihlo; ungacabangi.
- Yekela umuntu akhethe ukuthi uyafuna yini, nini njalo lobani ukwabelana ngolwazi lwakhe.
- Buza ukuthi ngubani umuntu ambona njengemuli lokuthi ngubani ongathola imibiko kumbe avakatshwe.
- Hlola ukuthi abahlinzeki bokunakekelwa bakubhala njani okuthandwayo, bavikele njani ubumfihlo njalo baphathe njani ukukhathazeka.
- Ubuwena buqakathekile, kodwa kuyingxenye eyodwa nje yempilo lomnakekelo womuntu.
Kulelikhasi (4 izigaba)
Ubuwena bomuntu we-LGBTQ+ kuyingxenye eyodwa yalokho ayikho khona. Buza ukuthi kuyini okuqakathekileyo kuye, sebenzisa amazwi awakhethayo, njalo myekele akhethe ukuthi ngubani ongakwazi imininingwane yakhe. Ungacabangi ngobuwena bomuntu, umlingani wakhe, ukusekelwa yimuli kumbe lokho akufunayo mayelana lobumfihlo ngokubona ukubukeka kwakhe, imibhalo endala kumbe ukuthi ngubani ovakatshelayo.
Umhlahlandlela we-Alzheimer’s Society wokusekela umuntu we-LGBTQ+ ophila ledementia ukhuthaza ukuthi kubuzwe ngalokho umuntu akufunayo njalo kugwenywe ukucabanga ngobudlelwano bakhe. Imithombo ye-Alzheimer’s Association mayelana le-LGBTQ+ ledementia iphinde ichaze ukukhathazeka mayelana lokucwaswa lokuthola ukunakekelwa okwamukelayo. Abantu abatshiyani; sebenzisa imibono le njengezikhuthazo zengxoxo, hatshi njengohlu oluchaza umuntu.
Ngingabuza njani mayelana lebizo, izabizwana lobumfihlo?
Khetha isikhathi sangasese, esingaphangisiyo. Ungabuza uthi, “Liliphi ibizo lezabizwana ofuna sizisebenzise?” kumbe “Kukhona yini mayelana lobuwena bakho kumbe ubudlelwano bakho ofuna labo abakusekelayo bakwazi?” Umuntu angaphendula ingxenye, atsho ukuthi hatshi, kumbe abuyele kukho muva. Akudingeki ukuthi ubuze imibuzo yomuntu siqu engahlobene lokunakekelwa kwakhe.
Buza ukuthi ngubani ongakwazi ini. Umuntu angafuna ukuthi umlingani wakhe aqashelwe ngabasebenzi kodwa angafuni ukuthi imuli yakhe ebanzi itshelwe mayelana lokuthanda kwakhe ngokocansi kumbe ubuwena bakhe ngobulili. Umuntu angaphinda akhethe amagama atshiyeneyo ezindaweni ezehlukeneyo. Ungabelani ngemininingwane yobuwena lezihlobo, izivakashi kumbe abasebenzi ngoba nje uyayazi.
Nxa umuntu efuna ukuthi okuthandwayo kubhalwe phansi, buza ukuthi kubhalweni njani lokuthi ngubani okumele akubone. Hlola ukuthi umhlinzeki uphatha njani ibizo elehlukileyo kweminye imibhalo, kubalwa lokuthi abasebenzi bangalisebenzisa yini ibizo umuntu alithandayo nxa bekhuluma laye. Gcina ubumfihlo bomuntu engqondweni; akusibo bonke abasiza ekunakekelweni abadinga yonke imininingwane.
Okuthandwayo kungatshintsha. Buza njalo nxa umuntu esenelisa ukuveza lokho akukhethayo, ikakhulu ngaphambi kokuthutha kumbe ukuhlela okunye ukunakekelwa. Nxa kungacacanga ukuthi ufuna kwabelwaneni, ungacabangi. Landela loba yikuphi akutshoyo ngokucacileyo kudala njalo ucele usizo kuchwepheshe ofaneleyo wendawo ngemibuzo mayelana lamalungelo okunakekela kumbe imithetho yokwabelana ngolwazi.
Ngubani okumele abekhona ezingxoxweni zokunakekelwa?
Buza umuntu ukuthi ngubani amethembayo njalo afuna ambandakanye. Inethiwekhi yakhe yokusekelwa ingabandakanya umkakhe, umlingani, umngane oseduze, isihlobo kumbe “imuli ekhethiweyo”—abantu abamsekela njengemuli lanxa bengahlobene ngegazi. Abanye abantu bathembele emulini abazalwa kuyo; abanye kabathembeli kuyo. Yekela umuntu achaze ubudlelwano bakhe ngamazwi akhe.
Buza imibuzo eluncedo: Ngubani ongavakatshela? Ngubani okumele abasebenzi bamfonela nxa amacebo etshintsha? Ngubani ongathola umbiko? Nxa umhlinzeki edinga imvumo kumbe amaphepha ngaphambi kokwabelana ngolwazi, buza ukuthi udingani njalo uchasisele umuntu okungakhethwa. Ukuba ngumlingani kumbe umsekeli okhethiweyo akutsho ngokuzenzakalelayo ukuthi ulalo ilungelo elisemthethweni lokwenza izinqumo; imithetho iyatshiyana ngokwendawo.
Sebenzisa ibizo lobudlelwano umuntu alithandayo. Umnakekeli obiza umlingani “umngane” kumbe “isihlobo” nxa umuntu efuna aqashelwe njengomlingani kungamdanisa. Inothi elifitshane, elisekelwe emvumeni, lingatshela abasebenzi ukuthi babethule njani abantu lokuthi yiphi imininingwane engabelwana ngayo.
Ngingabuzani umhlinzeki wokunakekelwa?
Nxa uqhathanisa ukunakekelwa kwasekhaya labadala, ukusekelwa ekhaya kumbe izinsizakalo zasemini zabadala, buza umuntu ukuthi yimiphi imibuzo afuna ukuyibuza lokuthi uyafuna yini ube khona. Umhlahlandlela we-SAGE wezinsizakalo ezamukelayo uthi ukwabelana ngolwazi lomuntu siqu lomhlinzeki kungazwakala kungavikelekanga. Cela umhlinzeki achaze izindlela zakhe zakhathesi ngamazwi alula.
- Libhala njani ibizo lezabizwana ezithandwayo? Ngobani abasebenzi abangabona lolulwazi?
- Umuntu angakhetha njani ukuthi ngubani ovakatshelayo njalo abe lesikhathi sangasese lomlingani kumbe omunye umsekeli?
- Lifunda njalo lihloniphe njani okuthandwa ngumuntu mayelana lendlu yokuhlala, izigqoko lokunakekelwa komuntu?
- Abasebenzi bathola luphi uqeqeqo mayelana labadala be-LGBTQ+ ledementia?
- Umhlali kumbe umsekeli angaveza njani ukukhathazeka mayelana lobumfihlo kumbe ukungahloniphi, njalo kwenzakalani ngemva kwalokho?
Umhlahlandlela we-SAGE le-Human Rights Campaign Foundation wokunakekelwa kwesikhathi eside okubandakanya bonke uphakamisa ukuthi kuhlolwe imithetho ebhaliweyo mayelana lokuvakatshela, indlu yokuhlala kanye lendlela abasebenzi abasebenza ngayo. Wakhutshwa ngo-2021; wusebenzisele imibuzo ongayibuza, hatshi njengesitatimende somthetho wendawo okhona khathesi. Imithetho lezinsizakalo kuyatshiyana ngokwendawo.
Uphawu, ibhukwana kumbe impendulo eyodwa eduduzayo akungeke kuqinisekise ukuthi ukunakekelwa kwansuku zonke kuzazwakala njani. Nxa umuntu efuna ukuvakatshela, qaphela ukuthi abasebenzi bambiza njani lokuthi baphendula njani kumlingani wakhe kumbe kubasekeli bakhe abakhethiweyo. Cela ukukhuluma labasebenzi ngasese nxa lokho kungasiza umuntu azizwe evikelekile.
Ngingamseka njani umuntu ngokupheleleyo?
Buza mayelana lalokho umuntu akuthandayo empilweni yansuku zonke, imikhuba yakhe, ulimi, amasiko, ukholo, abangane lomphakathi wakhe. Ubuwena bakhe bungaqakatheka ukukhulunywa ngabo, kumbe angakhetha ukuchitha isikhathi kwezinye izingxenye zempilo. Ungaphenduli lonke uvakatshelo lube yingxoxo ngobuwena kumbe ucabange ukuthi bonke abantu be-LGBTQ+ bake baba lempilo efananayo.
Abanye abantu bake bahlangana lokwaliwa kumbe ukucwaswa njalo bangazizwa beqaphele mayelana lezinsizakalo. Abanye bangakuboni lokhu njengento ekhathazayo. Lalela ungaceli umuntu ukuthi achaze kumbe afakaze loba yini. Nxa inkumbulo, isithombe kumbe indaba yekhathesi eyedlulayo imdanisa, buza ukuthi uyafuna yini ukuyekela kumbe ukutshintsha isihloko.
Nxa ungumlingani, umngane kumbe isihlobo, ukusekelwa kwakho lakho kuqakathekile. Buza umuntu ukuthi ufuna ubambe iqhaza njani, njalo udinge inhlanganiso yendawo ye-dementia kumbe eyabadala be-LGBTQ+ nxa udinga iseluleko. Ikhasi lemithombo ye-Alzheimer’s Association lixhumanisa lemithombo yomphakathi leyabanakekeli; okutholakalayo kuncike endaweni ohlala kuyo.
Ukuze uthole olunye uhlu lokuhlola nxa uqhathanisa amakhaya okunakekela, bona ukukhetha ukunakekelwa kwe-dementia endaweni yokuhlala. Ukuze uthole usizo lokuhlela ngemva kokuxilongwa, bona izinyathelo zokuqala ngemva kokuxilongwa kwe-dementia.
Imibuzo evamile
Kumele ngitshele abasebenzi bokunakekelwa yini ukuthi umuntu uyi-LGBTQ+?
Buza umuntu ukuthi ufuna abasebenzi baziwoni lokuthi ngubani ongakwazi. Yabelana kuphela ngalokho avumayo ukwabelana ngakho nxa kungenzeka, njalo ubuze umhlinzeki ukuthi ulwazi luzabhalwa njani lokuthi ngubani ongalubona.
Ngubani okumele abekhona ezingxoxweni zokunakekelwa?
Buza umuntu ukuthi ngubani amethembayo njalo afuna ambandakanye. Lokhu kungaba ngumlingani, umngane, isihlobo kumbe imuli ekhethiweyo; ungacabangi ukuthi isihlobo segazi yiso esifuneka kakhulu.
Kumele ngibuze ikhaya lokunakekela ngani mayelana lokwamukela abantu be-LGBTQ+?
Buza ngamabizo lezabizwana emibhalweni, izivakashi lesikhathi sangasese, okuthandwayo ngendlu yokuhlala lokunakekelwa komuntu, ukuqeqeshwa kwabasebenzi, kanye lokuthi ukukhathazeka kuphathwa njani. Cela imithetho ebhaliweyo ekhona khathesi nxa iqakathekile.
Kungenzakalani nxa umuntu esetshintsha lokho afuna ukukwabelana?
Okuthandwayo kungatshiyana ngomuntu, indawo lesikhathi. Buza umuntu njalo nxa kungenzeka, njalo ungadaluli ulwazi ngenxa yengxoxo eyadlulayo nxa esecela ukuthi ulugcine luyimfihlo.
Imithombo
Sixhumanisa nezinhlangano nezifundo okuthembele kuzo lolu khasi. Ngayinye yahlolwa lapho kubuyekezwa ikhasi.
- Supporting an LGBTQ+ person with dementia · Alzheimer's Society
- LGBTQ+ Community Dementia Resources · Alzheimer's Association
- 10 Tips for Finding LGBT-Affirming Services · SAGE
- Finding an LGBTQ+ Inclusive Long-Term Care Community · SAGE and Human Rights Campaign Foundation