Activities for Men with Dementia

People often search for “activities for men with dementia” because the usual suggestions do not seem to fit the man in their life. That is a fair concern. But the answer is not a list of “manly” activities. It is to start with this particular man: what he did for a living, what he did with his weekends, and what made him feel useful. Interests vary for everyone. Plenty of men love to cook, garden, paint or sing, and plenty of women love cars and baseball.

How do I find activities he will actually enjoy?

Begin with his life story. The Alzheimer’s Association suggests building a daily plan around the person’s likes, dislikes, strengths and interests, and around how he used to structure his day. Ask yourself:

• What was his work? Office, farm, factory, trade, military, sales, teaching, driving, the home?
• What did he do in his free time? Fishing, cards, woodworking, sports, church, music, cooking, a car in the garage?
• What were his routines? Coffee and the paper every morning? Checking the weather? Washing the car on Saturdays?
• What does he still start on his own? The Association notes that if a person begins tasks without being asked, such as sweeping the floor, those tasks can become part of the routine.
• What does he avoid? Some people enjoy watching sports; others find the pace and noise upsetting. Notice when he seems happy, anxious or irritable.

Talk with family and old friends too. They may remember interests that have faded from daily life.

Activity ideas based on past work

The Alzheimer’s Association gives a clear example: a former office worker might enjoy organizing tasks, like putting coins in a holder, helping assemble a mailing or making a to-do list, while a former farmer or gardener may enjoy working in the yard. The same idea applies to many jobs.

Some memories, such as military service, can bring up strong feelings. Follow his lead, keep talk about the past positive, and change the subject gently if he seems upset.

Activity ideas based on hobbies

1. Woodworking. Sanding a smooth block of wood or painting a birdhouse kit. The Alzheimer’s Association suggests removing hazardous materials and tools from the workshop so an activity like sanding can be enjoyable and safe.
2. Fishing. Sorting a tackle box with the hooks removed, looking through fishing magazines, or sitting by a pond together.
3. Cars. Washing the car, polishing chrome, looking at classic car photos, or going for a drive as a passenger.
4. Sports. Watching a classic game or highlights, tossing a soft ball, putting golf balls on a carpet, or sorting baseball cards.
5. Cards and games. A simple hand of a familiar card game, dominoes, or turning over cards to find a match. Keep it relaxed and drop keeping score.
6. Music. Songs from his teens and twenties, a favorite band, or a hymn. See our music activities guide.
7. Cooking and grilling. Washing vegetables, stirring sauce, shaping burgers, or describing how he made his famous chili while you cook it.
8. The newspaper. The Alzheimer’s Association notes that a person who always read the paper may still enjoy doing so, even if he cannot fully follow the content. Coffee and the paper can stay part of the morning.
9. Building. Large-piece model kits or simple construction sets for adults. Choose pieces that are easy to grip.
10. Caring for something. Feeding a pet, filling the bird feeder, or watering plants. The NIA lists feeding, grooming or walking a pet among activities people may enjoy.

How do I offer an activity without it feeling like busywork?

Present it as real help. The Alzheimer’s Association suggests asking “Could you please help me?” and connecting tasks to a purpose. Compare:

• “Do you want to sort these bolts?” (sounds like a test)
• “I bought a mixed bag of hardware and I need these sorted before I fix the shelf. Can you give me a hand?” (sounds like a job)

Other tips:

• Use adult materials. Real tools with sharp edges removed, real catalogs, real envelopes.
• Work side by side. Two people working on a job is company. One person watching another is supervision.
• Do not correct. If bolts end up in the wrong cup, let it be. What matters is the time together and the feeling of being useful.
• Help him start. The Alzheimer’s Association notes many people still have the desire to do things but struggle to organize and begin. Do the first one together.

How do I adapt as things change?

As dementia progresses, the Alzheimer’s Association suggests introducing simpler, more repetitive tasks and being ready for the person to take a less active role. A man who once rebuilt engines may now enjoy holding a clean wrench and talking about cars, or watching you work. Watching is taking part.

If he was highly skilled at something, a related activity may feel better than his old craft. The Association notes that a professional artist might be frustrated by changes in his work, while an amateur might enjoy a new outlet. The same is true of a master carpenter.

Safety with work-style tasks

• Remove power tools, blades, nails and screws with sharp tips.
• Lock up paint thinner, gasoline, and chemicals.
• Keep car keys out of sight if he no longer drives.
• Supervise all workshop and yard tasks.
• Choose large pieces that cannot be swallowed.

What if he says no?

Respect it. A no may mean the task feels too hard, too babyish or simply not right today. The Alzheimer’s Association cautions not to force it. Try a different task, a different time, or just sit together. See what to do when they say no.

Games and conversation that fit

Finish the Saying uses familiar American sayings and leads into conversation. Conversation Cards has open, no-quiz prompts by theme, which can open stories about work and hobbies. Picture Puzzle keeps the whole picture visible while you swap pieces, and the large-print Word Search can be printed and done with a pen at the kitchen table. For ways to talk about his past without testing him, see our reminiscence guide.